Working with self-doubt
Self-doubt and its big brother imposter syndrome affect a high proportion of people, and coaches are no exception. In fact they may be more prone than most.
By David Clutterbuck · 3 min read
Ask David is a curated AI clone of me & my work allows Coaches, Mentors & business professionals to have a conversation with ‘me’ 24/7 and work through ideas, challenges and to develop clarity in your decision making.
Why coaches may be more prone than most
It’s not surprising that users have been addressing the issue of their own self-doubt (some client related but mostly their own doubts). Self-doubt and its big brother imposter syndrome affect a high proportion of people; and coaches are no exception. In fact, they may be more prone than most people to these feelings, because they self-reflect more.
In praise of imposter syndrome
The social scientist Adam Grant a few years ago wrote an article in praise of imposter syndrome. He argued that having a reasonable level of self-doubt was an asset, because it made us more open to self-development. It’s a useful reframing.
Useful questions when self-doubt arises
When we feel self-doubt, we can choose either to ruminate about it, or to face up to it as a learning opportunity. Useful questions include:
What can I change about the context, where I feel inadequate?
What strengths can I draw upon, to feel more confident in this situation?
Whose help can I call upon?
What experiments could I conduct? (The shift from failure to planned failure is a subtle one. The former leads to self-blame; the latter recognises that failure is built into experimentation and is central to achievement. Most great breakthroughs happen by building on successive experimental failures.)
When a client reveals their own self-doubt
Burdening clients with our own self-doubts would be an indulgence and hardly client centred. However, there are times, when a client reveals self-doubts, that it can be helpful to tell them they are not alone. Working through a shared self-doubt – perhaps using some of the questions above – can help them build confidence, because they are not carrying the problem alone.
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Questions
Why are coaches prone to imposter syndrome?
Self-doubt and imposter syndrome affect a high proportion of people and coaches are no exception. They may in fact be more prone than most people to these feelings, because they self-reflect more.
Can self-doubt be a good thing?
The social scientist Adam Grant wrote an article in praise of imposter syndrome, arguing that a reasonable level of self-doubt is an asset because it makes us more open to self-development. When we feel self-doubt we can choose either to ruminate about it or to face up to it as a learning opportunity.
What questions help when you feel self-doubt?
What can I change about the context where I feel inadequate? What strengths can I draw upon to feel more confident in this situation? Whose help can I call upon? What experiments could I conduct?
Should a coach share their own self-doubt with a client?
Burdening clients with our own self-doubts would be an indulgence and hardly client centred. However, when a client reveals self-doubts it can be helpful to tell them they are not alone, because working through a shared self-doubt helps them build confidence rather than carrying the problem alone.